Ep 39 | There Is Nothing to Fix: Feeling to Heal and the Breath as Your Bridge
Welcome to Rise and Realign. Conversations for the sensitive soul. I'm Melissa, and this space is for those of us who feel deeply, love fiercely, and sense the world in ways that our heart keeps bringing impossible to ignore. Here, we honor your sensitivity as a strength, not something to fix. Through reflections, realignment, and soul-led stories, we remember how to move through life in a way that feels true to who we really are. This is your space to rise, to realign, and to come home again and again to your own wise, sensitive, authentic self.
So last week, Episode 38, Quantum Sensitivity: From Mental Loops to Conscious Co-Creation. I reflected on the relationship that we have with our own body, our mind, and our spirit, and how so many of us have been living from mental processes that keep us looping, waterlogged, and disconnected from the stillness where our inner guidance actually resides.
So this is really what I want to speak to, because when I even reflect back to 2008 and the way I was living my life, very earthly plane, physically focused, but yet also very open and curious. I did go to church at the time. My children were young. I wanted them to know that they were connected to something greater and to develop their own relationship. But once I had that spiritual awakening, there just was no kind of religious lingo. It was more of this energy, right? I've referred to it as this pure positive love energy. And things that I remember still very clearly are, I remember being on a massage table and just feeling this full-body breath, you know? This just life force energy moving through me in such a full way that I had never experienced before. And it was just so magical, the way it just made me feel so safe and supported, held and connected.
And following those initial weeks of bliss and love and light and perfect healing and all of that, is when I began navigating strong emotions and just feeling that activation of frustration, or, why isn't something happening faster than I want it to? And why aren't my decisions that I thought were so great working out for me? And I've certainly learned so much from 2008, as I'm sure all of you have, right?
But some of the things that I definitely have continued to recognize is that we need to face our fears. We really need to feel what's moving through us to heal, right? I say face your fears and you need to feel it to heal it. And now, that's taken on different understandings from my own personal journey, in addition to the women that I have the honor of supporting.
But definitely, when I reflect on this spiral journey, right, this in a sense circling back to previous experiences again, like, what else have I gleaned from it? Or a similar situation, and a new opportunity for how I'm going to move through that experience, right? That has just helped me see that, and again, this is why I talk to you in the way that says there's nothing wrong with you. And there's nothing to fix. Your journey is uniquely yours. You know, whether you or I or any of us remember, on the other side, we said, yes, let me go to that earthly realm, and here's my soul curriculum, and then we get here, and come on, the way we're created and develop, and we're just these like sponges, and we take on so much from our environment, our parents, right?
And I love the work of Bruce Lipton, and of course psychology, quantum physics, so many different areas that I reference regularly. But just understanding that those early years do have imprinting. I've done, I'm also certified as a clinical heart-centered hypnotherapist, and so when I was going through the training and I was the client, I tapped into experiences that I was like, how could I even remember this? How can I know this? And even some of my experiences brought me to past lives that just showed me this evolutionary journey that we're on when we're here.
And what's funny is, I remember early on in my spiritual journey of awakening, right, from 2008, I remember the first time I heard somebody talk about past life regression or past life experiences. I remember so clearly having this hand up, like a stop sign, like, nope, I'm not going down that road. I really need to understand how to live in this lifetime, never mind go back to reference previous lifetimes. So if this is the first time you're hearing about this, believe me, there's nothing wrong with where you are on your journey, what you are aware of or not.
And I've said it before, since my awakening journey, I've been exposed to so many different paths, I'll say, right? And what interests people and what their unique journeys bring them. And this is why I just always want you to come back to yourself. Because there's times when, gosh, I remember early on in my awakening too, in the Louise Hay movie, You Can Heal Your Life, Esther and Jerry Hicks were talking. And I remember that was the first time I had ever heard about channeling. And I definitely felt the walls go up. I was just like, no thank you. I do not want to know anything about that. It kind of spooked me.
But it didn't take long before I saw an interview where they were just talking about how she started meditating and how she referenced Seth Speaks and meeting with the woman who channeled Seth. And it was just like, okay, this isn't so wild and crazy like I thought. And I actually used to listen to Abraham Hicks quite a bit in those early years.
And then everything changed when I went to one of the events, which it wasn't my first event, but it was the first time I got in the hot seat. And I did not feel that pure positive love energy coming at me and around me, and that didn't feel good. So again, I followed my own inner guidance that said, you know what, that may work for some people, and a lot of people, because Abraham Hicks has been, gosh, I first started going to events in probably 2009, so they were already traveling for years. Their material is out there readily accessible to many people. But for me personally, I took a turn away from it where I was just like, that just doesn't feel like the love and light that I'm here to experience.
And so again, not saying that those who are drawn to Abraham Hicks or them themselves, that there's anything wrong. This is just me speaking to how your journey is uniquely yours. And something that you may feel nervous about or scared about, or feel your walls build up, that is your nervous system protecting you, right? And that's what we want to understand. Our nervous system is taking in so much information, right? And this is for everybody, but as highly sensitive individuals, we're taking five times more input. So you get a stronger signal, right? This high-resolution navigational system that you have is something that you really want to hone in on and understand how it's communicating with you.
Because I can certainly tell you that I've recognized patterns within myself, right? Where I used to, when things felt really strong and my nervous system just, that armor came up and that protective mode was just like, I need to make a decision because I need to exit. But again, I want you to know that wherever you are on your journey is perfectly designed for you. And the invitation is to again, feel what you need to feel as you face those fears, right? Because that's part of the process of moving. Emotion is referred to as energy in motion, right?
So I would describe anxiety for me as I'm feeling this nervous energy. Or anger, I would say, like, I'm feeling my blood boil, like the temperature's rising. But again, when we understand the mind-body connection, the more we can be with what's arising and just be fully present, it allows us to face the fears because that's what you're going to get from the thoughts, right? The thoughts are what start to be protective and saying what you need to do, right? And again, there's nothing wrong with this voice of protection. That's a natural part of our inner dialogue. It's the relationship that we have with it, and to understand these different internal voices.
So the reason that I brought up some of these things is just, there's so many different ways to walk this path, and you've heard me say before, there's not one right or wrong way. Even the ones that feel really heavy and hard, it's for a purpose. It's something that you, knowingly or unknowingly, said, I want to learn this, right? I want to discover more about this.
And I've said before, from a Human Design perspective, my incarnation cross is the Sleeping Phoenix, right? So this is one of the reasons why I use the word rise a lot. Rise and realign, because for me, it's about rising up out of that heaviness, that guardedness, that big emotion, or even that voice of protection that's saying, like, you've got to do something about this, right? You've got to make a decision. It's therefore part of my journey. And so I do spiral through things many times, so I gain all these different perspectives.
But what I want to say about this is, the breath is the bridge. I've been teaching this for years and years and years, since my awakening, of course. Although I did do Dialectical Behavior Therapy in my early part of my career. So of course, mindfulness, breathing practice, that's all something that has been part of my career. But to really have the breath as the through-line, as its primary focus, that came after my spiritual awakening, or soul awakening remembrance.
But it's that our breathing gets constricted, right? And that prevents the feelings from being fully felt, and oftentimes that's when we get that heaviness, that guardedness, that waterlogged feeling that I talked about, right? And even the mental looping process, because it hasn't finished. We haven't felt what we need to feel fully. And so it just kind of gets, it'll just come around again.
And so again, just speaking to the invitation for you to tune inward, tune in to you more. What are you feeling? What are you sensing? What are you becoming more aware of, right? Because rising for me is also about rising in awareness, right? As a highly sensitive woman, that was so powerful, the more I studied the research and Dr. Elaine Aron's work, the more I was like, oh my god, this just explains so much, you know, these different aspects of what I'm experiencing and what these women I'm supporting are experiencing. And then the way the universe would just bring me more and more women who became very clear that they were highly sensitive, and the universe just guided me on this path of, this is who you're here to support. Not only learn this for yourself, but actually bring it into your professional offerings.
So the breath being the bridge is what allows you to feel what's coming up for you to heal. And so in the past, like I said, I would have heard of myself as high-strung. I didn't have time for a lot of things. I used to feel significant frustration when something unexpected showed up, and these are all different episodes that I've talked more in depth about. But the important thing to understand is, when we are so overloaded with schedules, with needing to feel the things that we haven't felt from decades ago, right? Like, this is why I continue to speak about take a break and breathe love every day.
Whatever breath practice you most feel called to use, whether that's that double inhale through the nose and then a nice, long and slow exhale out the mouth, just one is better than none, but I'm a big fan of at least three. But the key is, do as many as you need to feel that release where you can be more present with what is, because that's the thing. When we have very busy and hectic lives, whether that's because of our career aspirations, passion, whether we're extroverted and have a really busy social life, whether we feel like we've got to do a gazillion different tasks and chores or activities for our health, right? All these different things. It's so important to recognize that rest is part of what we need. We need these restful periods beyond just our sleep at night, which sleep is huge for our health, right? Our holistic health, because it allows the body to do its detoxing, its repairing while we're resting, and we don't have those mental processes going. And it does allow us to get rest from the list of to-dos, the experiences that we haven't fully processed and may still be spending a bit.
And it's where you're connected again more fully with your soul, your spirit. So sleep is number one. So if you are somebody who's not giving attention to your sleep or feeling really off because you're not feeling rested, I really want you to hear the invitation to give more attention to your sleep. And if you don't already, align your body with the circadian rhythms, waking up with the sun, getting outside right away, bare feet on the earth, first thing in the morning, I'm grateful for the day. But starting the day in a healthy way, connected to yourself, your source, the earth, right? Like all of these things are so important.
So when I talk about rest, I'm not only talking about sleep, I'm not only talking about take a break and breathe love, right? It's like, these are things that we need to include in every day. And so if you're in a stage of life where you feel like life is too hectic and you don't have time to take a break and breathe love, I really, really invite you to reassess. I tell people, hey, while you're laying in bed, take a break and breathe love first thing in the morning. Just start right out of the gate. Every time you use a restroom, perfect time, just again, take a break and breathe love while you're there. Like, keep bringing yourself back to your center.
Just saying that reminded me of when I first traveled across the country with my family, and we were in California, and I was delving into Joseph Campbell and all of his journey and all of his research, and I was learning about so many different religious and spiritual practices. And I remember hearing in Hinduism how they pause five times across the day to do their prayer rituals in the way that they do it. And I just remember feeling completely aligned with that. It makes total sense. We can't just do it once a day. We can't just say, oh, we get our rest when we sleep, right? Like, it's something that we need throughout the day, because there are unexpected things that happen, right? I mean, this morning I woke up and we didn't have electricity. Like, that totally changed my rhythm and flow, right? So life happens. This earthly plane presents us with so many different opportunities to, as I say, realign.
But it's something that we do need to become more aware of. So I invite you to just pause now, or later this evening. Have a notepad handy or just speak it to your own voice recorder. And just reflect on, how many times throughout the day do you actually pause to, as I call it, take a break and breathe love, right? How often are you pausing to reconnect with your breath, your body, your heart?
Because stress is really impacting so many of us. And highly sensitive individuals with that more finely tuned central nervous system, when we don't understand how we're taking in so much and how we're not having the time to process and discharge that stress, it compounds. And compounding stress is detrimental to our well-being, right? We're talking physical health, mental health, all of it, our relationships, everything can suffer. And it doesn't have to be that way.
I definitely want you to know that you're not alone if you're somebody who's living in chronic go mode or stress mode, or you just don't know how to slow things down because you have beliefs that say you've got to keep pushing forward. I'm really here to remind you that it is important that you have ample times for rest.
The other day, I was recording for my Rise and Realign Lunar Letter, and I was just saying it's like the pendulum that needs to swing. We need to know how to come back to our center, right? And again, being activated, being stressed, that sympathetic nervous system is just on high alert, and it gets compounded, and we're not able to really relax and breathe and receive all that we need in the ways that we truly can as we come back into alignment with who we really are as whole beings. And especially as sensitive souls.
So I just want to invite you into a more restful state, one that really meets you where you are, and that it allows you to rise up out of the old patterns that don't serve you, that help you rise in awareness of where you may be going in too many different directions or too fast, and to really bring you back into alignment with your own heart, your own soul, your own inner guidance. Alignment with your higher self and this physical self is something really incredible. I'm really grateful that I live in alignment with that and have for almost 18 years now. Because when we are only physically focused, right, only focused on the 3D, those guards just keep coming up, that protective voice just speaks really loud.
So the more you come home to yourself, the more opportunities you give to the voice of your soul, the voice of your higher self, whatever terminology feels most resonant for you.
So before we close, I invite you to return to your breath. To your body. To what feels true for you right now. There's nothing you need to fix. Just notice what's here.
Where the heart leads, the body remembers, and the soul awakens. As a reminder, we are here together to rise, reclaim, remember. And as always, I am so deeply grateful that you're here. You are so important. Your journey, your voice, your presence, all matters. And if you'd like to walk this sensitive and strong, realigned path with me, you can explore everything at realignwithmelissa.com. I have both my holistic psychotherapy offers for those who reside in California, Massachusetts, and Arizona. And then I also have other integrative consultations and educational things like my Your Sensitivity Is Intelligent Design Essentials Course, which will have a six-month component to it for a small group of women. But it's all right there anytime you want to explore.
So take good care of you. Much love and light.
